seacielo - Da Kine o’ Life

rationalizing is a good thing? maybe so. then again, whatever qualifies will do me a sense of betterment. well at least i know this time that it is really my pain. finally… this is my own ordeal. or maybe, most of it. i wrote off the fact that i am an empath. finding about daddy was a series of dreams; an everyday of his lies… and so on. i can always feel people especially the ones i love most in this lifetime.

it’s funny no? …………………………………………………………….

geezh… will i ever be normal? every inch of me is screaming for mediocrity. i want to be ordinary. i want to be invisible. i want to melt into the depth of crowd. but i can’t… i just can’t. should i be rather happy? thankful perhaps? my existence is a burden. it’s threatening to my life. i am grieving inside. i want to tear my skin off. i want to scrape every flesh.

but hey, i figured, i might as well dwell and turn everything around. i can’t keep doing this drama. i might as well stand up and get it over with. i know i am sick - in a good and bad way, either way i am sick. i know the solution, but right now i refuse to take refuge in them. not now. not yet. but for sure… i am thinking.